What is Love?

The archetype of partnership

There is no doubt that this card is absolutely gorgeous but I have to admit that it has been the most intimidating for me to write about thus far. The reason for this is because I have never achieved a successful union. I don’t just mean that my relationships didn’t last forever. I mean that they ended, for me, in heartbreak, anger, pain or hardship.

This is where astrology has helped me immensely. I’m a Saturn in the 7th house gal, with Saturn in only difficult aspects to my Sun, Mars, Lilith and Neptune. To translate for non-astrology folks: it doesn’t get much worse for prospects to have positive relationship experiences. At least until after age 50.

I’m 55 now and miraculously, I haven’t completely given up on the kind of union the Lovers card depicts. But I understand that Saturn sometimes denies and I’m spiritually mature enough now to give this decision up to God.

I could write a whole book on all of my relationships that I ended up regretting, but I don’t want to.

Instead, I’m going to get philosophical about this. The Tarot is symbolic and this card depicts romantic union as not just an initiatory stage in life, but as an archetype and an energy.

This is obviously a positive union. One that is ordained by God and overseen by Archangel Raphael. Based on my own experiences, it is hard for me to believe in such an earthly divine union, but it DOES happen, doesn’t it?

In Biblical terms, the prototype for this couple is the symbolic first humans: Adam and Eve. What relationship can be more important than one that procreates and perpetuates the species?

What IS love really?

Is it a spiritual connection in which two souls merge because they feel like one?

Is it shared happiness and support?

Is it enjoying beauty?

Is it growing old with someone?

Is it loyalty?

Is it desire?

Is it sexual attraction?

Is it passion?

Is it bonding by going through all kinds of shit together, facing challenges and problems?

Is it increasingly understanding someone?

Is it becoming a better person through relationship with another?

Is it feeling comfortable, safe and stable with someone?

Or perhaps it is simply a state of being in which masculine and feminine energies come together to form an integrated union, as this card shows…and all of the other elements I have mentioned could be a part of that union or not—but it still LOVE.

Modern people tend to conceptualize love as a feeling. Perhaps my particular relationship history as helped me achieve a highly refined understanding of what the most ideal partnership is: not undying feelings of romance, infatuation and desire but a committed union that is a process of striving towards energetic perfection.

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